I’ll be honest — I don’t care if this one annoys you. Reaching my 100th song felt like a milestone worth celebrating, so I had to pick something a bit special… and what better choice than Star Trekkin’ by The Firm? Why? Well, what did you expect from a fanatic Star Trek fan.
Released in May 1987 as a full-blown novelty track, Star Trekkin’ entered the UK charts at a modest No. 71 before doing something few would have predicted — it shot all the way to No. 1, where it stayed for two weeks. Not bad for a song that fully embraces the ridiculous at full warp speed.
To be fair, the timing couldn’t have been better. Star Trek was riding a wave of popularity. The franchise had just marked its 20th anniversary, Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home had been a huge success in the cinema with both fans and newcomers, and Star Trek: The Next Generation was just around the corner. The appetite was there — and this song cheekily tapped right into it.
One random memory that always makes me smile: hearing it at a school disco. Everyone enthusiastically belted out the main verses, but when it got to the rapid-fire ending…
“Ye cannae change the script… och, see you, Jimmy!
It’s worse than that, it’s physics, Jim!
Bridge to engine room, warp factor 9…”
Och, if I give it any more she’ll blow, Cap’n!”
…suddenly, silence from everyone. Apart from me.
Turns out I was the only one who knew that bit, so I ended up delivering a very unexpected solo performance. Not planned, not cool — but definitely memorable.
Look, it’s cheesy. It’s daft. It probably gets on a lot of people’s nerves.
But I can’t help it — I absolutely love it.
Scotty… beam me up.
